Montclair Presbyterian Church

Aches and pains in youth group games, hurt feelings in the sanctuary, disruptions in Godly Play, and stretch-marks ripping away at every corner of the church calendar… What is wrong with us? Dear friends, in my eyes it seems that our church has been suffering from a serious case of growing pains. Ben alluded to this a few weeks ago in his Contact piece when he gave us advice for dealing with a packed calendar. Today I want to add to that conversation from a different point of view. It’s not just the calendar that is full, but also our pews and classrooms. There aren’t just new things happening, but new people with us. We have new teachers and new children in Godly Play, and with nearly a dozen new youth in Youth Group, we are seeking more adult advisors for youth group as well. New visitors walk through our doors every week, some just to visit, and some to stay.

Some of these people don’t know our expectations. Some may be young and not yet know how to keep themselves calm and quiet in exciting new places. Some may not be sufficiently reverent about old traditions we hold dear. Some may not be on time, or in the right place, or living up to any of a thousand other tiny standards we hold for them. None of these standards are terrifically important, but when they are repeatedly trampled on, it causes a situation where half of us feel right and righteous, and the other half feel wrong and embarrassed.

Disruptions are hard, and we often experience disruption when new people join our circles. Jerome Berryman, the wise guru of Godly Play, writes that we should not see disruption as bad. It does not mean that the teacher is not teaching well enough, or that the students are not “good listeners.” Rather, it is an opportunity for teaching and for strengthening the circle. We may have to repeat a simple lesson several times. We may leave the “advanced” material out of the lesson, so that we can include those who are just beginning. The old-timers among us may roll their eyes and ask why those newcomers are wasting our time, and the teacher may have to remind them that they were newcomers once too.

If we are to be a church that truly welcomes the immigrant, we need to start by more fully welcoming one another. So when we experience disruptions in church, think of it as an opportunity to practice the spiritual discipline of hospitality. The epistle of the Hebrews says “Do not neglect to show hospitality to strangers, for by doing so, some have entertained angels without knowing it.” God chooses to hide Godself from us, disguised in the faces of the stranger, the poor, the unsophisticated and unaware – and especially, in the little children. May God find welcome with us.

Blessings,
Talitha

This Sunday as we celebrate World Communion with breads of the world, we will also take the Peace and Global Witness offering. This is one of the four yearly offerings of the Presbyterian Church (USA) which we participate in. Each offering has a different purpose and together they maintain wonderful and very important ministries.

One Great Hour of Sharing is the biggest and most well-known offering, especially since other denominations participate as well. It supports hunger relief, disaster assistance, and our program called “Self Development of Peoples” worldwide. The Pentecost offering supports young adult volunteers and children at risk. The Christmas Joy offering supports leaders past, present, and future, with assistance programs for college students and retired pastors. For years we have taken a Peacemaking offering, which at the 2014 General Assembly was expanded and renamed as the Peace and Global Witness offering. The broadening of the offering means it now includes other aspects of global mission that have been underfunded. And in case you are allergic to the colonial connotations of the word “mission,” please know that our church is spectacular at being culturally sensitive, politically appropriate and creatively collaborative in our mission. We don’t have missionaries any more — we have mission co-workers, joining alongside local organizations, churches, seminaries and more in their ministries around the world.

So, this offering supports our peacemaking, reconciliation, and outreach efforts as we seek to be God’s people in the world. Up to 25% of the received offering stays right here at MPC, 25% goes to the San Francisco Presbytery, and 50% to the Presbyterian Mission Agency where it is disbursed to our ministries around the world.

Our MPC portion has for several years been contributed to OCO – Oakland Community Organizations. Among the work of OCO is Lifelines to Healing, a campaign which works to address the root causes of violence and crime in Oakland and the cycle of mass incarceration that disproportionately affects the lives of young Black and Latino men. As another example of what our funds do at the Presbytery level, I’d like to mention the program “Peace Camp” in Richmond. Each summer at Sojourner Truth Presbyterian Church they have a camp for school-age children to learn violence prevention and peacemaking methods that they can use in their schools, homes, and neighborhoods. They begin as young as 1st grade! What a valuable program in a neighborhood that can surely use it.

As we have prayed for peace in so many ways over the last month, I hope that you will also be generous in contributing to this offering on Sunday.

Blessings,
Talitha

We are coming up to World Communion Sunday, which is my favorite minor church holiday of the year. Perhaps because it’s the most delicious, or perhaps because being so minor has saved the holiday from being coopted or commercialized, I will always have a special place in my heart for the first Sunday in October. On this day we remember that we are one with the Church throughout the world and all ages, and we show this in our worship as tangibly as possible. This means Irish soda bread, Indian naan, Italian focaccia, New York bagels, Palestinian pita, Native American fry bread and much, much more. Debbie Fallehy’s bread-baking Family Life Small Group will contribute a loaf, and you are also invited to bring bread from your family’s culinary heritage.

I celebrated this holiday for the first 17 years of my life in a very diverse church. At Broadway Presbyterian Church in New York City, we were near Columbia and all its international students, adjacent to Harlem’s historic African-American neighborhoods, and just blocks away from the vacant lots where the legendary gangs of West Side Story battled out their ethnic rivalries in song and dance. World Communion Sunday brought so many people together, and as we stood around the table in saris and kente cloth, kimonos and suits, the vision of our multicolored clothes and faces taught me an image of heaven, where all shall be reconciled with God and one another.

Montclair may be a less diverse neighborhood than the Upper West Side… but we are well-traveled, and many of us have left bits of our hearts in one country or another. A piece of my heart is in Uganda. Some of our MPC members are in Bolivia right now. So I would invite you to bring a loaf, a tortilla, a rice bowl, or another alternative — either from your family’s heritage OR from a country you especially love.
You have advance notice so you can get excited and choose your best international outfits and recipes. This is happening on Sunday Oct 5th. If you can contribute bread please both RSVP to me, and deliver it early (9:45) before church.

Every Blessing,
Talitha

First, the good news: Kickoff Sunday was a terrific amount of fun, and our Godly Play and Youth Group programs are full to bursting. We had 16 children between the two Godly Play classrooms, and 28 youth meant the Youth Group room was barely big enough to fit us, much less play active games in. I am careful to steer clear of the illusion that bigger is better, and in fact I can already see that we will go through some growing pains as we adjust. But we have reason to rejoice and feel excited as we watch these programs stretch to include new people, so I will lift up a prayer of gratitude to God for these blessings.

Then, my mind turns to another program which started, flapped its wings a bit, but never really took off last year: the Grief and Spirituality Group. As I think of the congregation and our spiritual needs I am aware that we have had many deaths recently in our MPC family. There are also many people, who are dealing with transitions… going into or out of work, or retirement, new homes or old homes, new family, declining health, or perhaps dreams deferred or plans canceled. I am very aware that in our cheerful culture of success and positive thinking, we seldom take enough time to honor our griefs. We seldom get the opportunity to share them with one another or hold them up to God, not trying to fix or medicate away, but just to live with them. But here in our faith community we have the opportunity to live differently, and not to hide or deny the fullness of who we are and all we experience.

So I want to offer something for the benefit of those who need to take time to honor their griefs. But I don’t know who all of you are, nor what would work best. Please let me know what you would be interested in, with a simple online form here: http://goo.gl/Y00AYF (or you can call me directly at the office to share your ideas). I can imagine three different ways it could work: (1) a monthly drop-in group where anyone is welcome… keeping in mind however that we would need “critical mass” to keep this going, about three or four people at a minimum. (2) A covenant group that agrees together on mutually convenient times to meet. I would call the first meeting and would lead it, but would leave scheduling in the hands of the members. (3) A few events each year, for example evening church services where all are welcome, but where the theme is remembering our griefs. Please let me know what you would be willing to help provide for one another.

Every Blessing,
Talitha

We are looking forward to seeing you all at Kickoff Sunday! This is such a great MPC tradition and I do believe everyone will enjoy the fun program we have planned. See below for details and reminders of what to bring.

Kickoff Sunday is a good excuse to get together and be merry, but it also marks important beginnings for the year. For example, we are adding a new Godly Play classroom, and so that program begins on Sunday. Children will be directed to the “orange” classroom (room 1) or the “green” classroom (room 4). On Kickoff Sunday we also begin Adult Education signups, and I am looking forward to enrolling in our Spanish class. And then, there is that mysterious new thing everyone’s been talking about… “Family Life Small Groups.” What are those, anyway?

When I arrived a year ago, I began meeting with Gretchen Garlinghouse to wrap our heads around one particular MPC issue. The Mission Study Report shared some interesting facts: in a church with 7 generations represented, many are only friends with those of their generation, and 22% of MPCers, according to our surveys, have no close friends at church. For many new people it feels hard to “break in” and to truly feel a part of the MPC community. So we want to provide ways to build intergenerational friendships. Thus, Family Life Small Groups have emerged through a year’s work of visioning, brainstorming, and organizing with a great group of people. You can sign up this week and next. If you missed the brochure that was handed out last Sunday in the bulletin, it is also available on our website. http://www.mpcfamily.org/events/family-life-small-groups.

These groups are intended to be short-term gatherings of the same people (i.e. not drop-in events) so that over the course of a few weeks or months you can get to know people in a deeper way. Each group has a theme, whether that is baking bread or cleaning up streams, and we ask you to commit to attending every time. And each group is limited in size, so…. hurry to sign up on Sunday! Call me at the office if you can’t make it then and need to register.

I thank God for the bursting energy, vision, and creativity we are enjoying at MPC!

Blessings,
Talitha

Youth Group had our first evening meeting last night, a huge event with 28 youth present! Although we strongly believe in quality over quantity, it’s hard not to be super excited by such a big group. We got to enjoy the newly redecorated youth group room with its many chalkboard surfaces for drawing on. We enjoyed getting to know one another one-on-one and sharing fun facts about each other with the group… we sang a little too and of course had a raucous game of “I need a shoelace.”

As we continue into the year, youth please bring an updated information form so you will be on our mailings.

We meet weekly, Sundays at 7 PM, at church.
Service Saturday 9/27 will be at Fruitvale Food Pantry, 2735 Macarthur Blvd (a change in location!)
Bowling excursion is 9/28 instead of our regular meeting (meet at Albany Bowl at 7, bring $5 plus money for any snacks you might want).

Fall retreat dates Oct 24-26 – registration begins Sept 24th.
Spring retreat dates April 17-19

Some of you have asked more about my ordination process, so I want to update you. I am really thrilled about the outpouring of support for my ministry here and I do appreciate that many of you are eager to see the process completed. I love working here and look forward to solidifying a long-term arrangement. However, as we are Presbyterians we operate according to our church’s favorite Bible verse, I Cor. 14:40: “All things should be done decently and in order.” At times our polity may seem slow, onerous or even redundant… but Presbyterian polity provides many important checks and balances to prevent abuse of power.

Amidst the flood of horrific news stories in the past few weeks many of you probably missed the story about the struggle at Mars Hill Church in Seattle, a member of the Acts 29 evangelical church network (note: not Presbyterian!). Various complaints were being filed over the years regarding the head pastor Mark Driscoll’s manipulative and coercive leadership style, including his methods of excommunicating and shunning members who disagreed with him. Finally his deception and coercion (not to mention misogyny and bullying) have caught up with him to the point that last week Acts 29 removed Mars Hill from membership in the network, and publically stated that Driscoll needs to receive help and to be removed from the pulpit.

I would not want to gloat over another church’s misfortune but we certainly can learn from it. In the Presbyterian Church (PCUSA) we have many systems of accountability that work against such abuses. Pastors are not bosses here, but are accountable to Session and to the local Presbytery. Even the most “powerful” person in our church – the Moderator of General Assembly – is merely a servant of making things run smoothly at the largest committee meeting we have. And while hiring a non-ordained staff member is an act of the congregation, ordination as Teaching Elder (pastor) is an act of the local Presbytery, and pastors are members of Presbytery rather than the congregation. So the circle of discernment is wider… and so is our accountability.

My ordination process is twofold. Much of it has already taken place under the auspices of the New York City Presbytery, where I discerned God’s call to ministry and was supported through my seminary years, internship, several examinations, and other requirements. From my initial desire to be a mission co-worker in Africa, to wanting in short succession to be a seminary professor, then a rural pastor, then a pediatric hospital chaplain, they helped me sort through God’s call and my many adventures on the way. That committee certified me as a “Candidate ready to receive a call” also known as “all but call” or ABC – meaning that I can be ordained as soon as a church calls me to a Pastor position with the agreement of a local Presbytery. The “call” process is now going into the hands of the San Francisco Presbytery. They will work with MPC to fulfill the requirements for calling a pastor – similar to the PNC that called Ben, with the additional requirement that the members of Presbytery also interview and examine the candidate when a new ordination is involved. By the way, an Associate Pastor’s job duties may not be very different from mine as Coordinator for Children, Youth, and Family Life. The main difference is that an Associate Pastor celebrates the Sacraments (communion and baptism), and has voice and vote privileges in Presbytery.

So I’d like to invite you to see it as a spiritual process along with me. Some of you may feel certain already that you would like me to be an Associate Pastor, but we will not rush ahead until our whole circle of accountability feels ready. This may include an update of our Mission Study, considering other candidates, and meetings with the local Committee on Ministry. Together we can let God’s spirit guide us through the process.

Every Blessing,
Talitha

Our Youth Group Mission Trip traveled to Memphis this year. We learned and served with several organizations doing food justice work, from farming to harvesting, to packing and cooking and serving food. Memphis is one of the hungriest cities in the nation as well as one of the most obese, so the work that these people are doing to get good, fresh, nutritious food into the hands of those who need it is truly God’s work.

We were privileged to work with the following organizations:
Roots Memphis Farm Academy
Green Leaf Learning Farm
Bring It Food Hub
We visited the Church Health Center (where we delivered veggies for a cooking class) and St Jude Children’s Hospital (where we delivered fresh chard for the cafeteria).
And partnered with the local mission of our host church, Idlewild Presbyterian, for “More Than A Meal.”

Photos from our work can be seen on our Flickr page.

And finally, on our Recreation Day, we had a great time doing a photo scavenger hunt around Memphis. Click here for the assignment and point system.

This scavenger hunt may seem like just silly fun, but in fact it did a lot to fulfill one important aspect of the Mission Trip: to inspire in us a deeper love and appreciation for God’s world, especially this city with its unique history and culture. Plus, how else can you learn about geography and play in a fountain at the same time?
Huge thanks to Anna Santos who planned most of the trip but was unable to come (hence, you may see her face in some of the photos from the scavenger hunt). The trip was a huge success, especially considering that some of the youth are now making plans for how they can return to Memphis.

Why go on a mission trip? Why go to help people other places when so many need help right here? Why waste so much money on airfare and luggage? Why, why, why? I am, of course, leading our youth on a mission trip starting this Saturday morning, so you may guess that I will find ways to answer these questions. But let me begin with my fist raised indignantly in the air about those questions. They are questions that need to be asked, and badly. The short-term mission trip industry is a broken and troublesome system. Churches across America spend millions of dollars each year sending unskilled teenagers to do menial labor in distant cities and countries. One example particularly sticks in my throat, of a church in Honduras that was painted three times in one year by three visiting “mission trips” who wanted to be “helpful” but didn’t really stop to ask how they could help. A lot of stupidity has been perpetuated in the name of God’s mission. When the youth got together to talk about our preparations for Memphis, I shared with them a quote from an Aboriginal Australian activist community:

“If you have come here to help me, you are wasting our time.
If you have come here because your liberation is bound up with mine,
then let us work together.”

Some of the youth were under the impression that we are going to Memphis because we will find the neediest of the needy there. To some extent that is true, but there are lots of needy people here in Oakland too. No, we are going to Memphis because there they are doing great work that will captivate us and inspire us for the better. We are going so that we might have the privilege of joining in some of the most exciting world-changing work around. Ten years ago Memphis did not have a single farmer’s market, and these days the city is hopping with new food options, bringing vegetables into the “food deserts,” reclaiming the neighborhoods from blight to urban farms, and finding ways to turn small gardens from expensive hobbies into money-making endeavors. With farms as small as 1/4 acre, they are making a new food economy possible.

So whenever I plan a mission trip I ask — am I doing this out of a sense of guilt or am I really trying to seek the good? If we are feeling noble about ourselves rather than humble and inspired, that’s a clue that we might be on the wrong track. There is always the existential benefit that travel adds (particularly to youth) in that it gets us out of our comfort zones and ready to look, listen, and learn. That by itself is not sufficient however. We need to be honest about the fact that we are not going to dramatically change anyone else’s lives. But we may, with God’s grace, change our own.

Please wish us safe journeys and keep us in your prayers!

Every Blessing,
Talitha

This week and last week I experienced a bit of a lull in my work load. Halfway between Family Camp and the Youth Mission Trip I have fewer things on my plate for a blessed moment… which means that I get to devote more of my time to one thing that is not calendar-driven: spiritual care. I am lucky to have this as part of my job – the pastoral work of visiting with you and supporting your spiritual journeys. Whether visiting someone in the hospital, or just chatting over a cup of tea, or reaching out by phone to someone who I know is having a hard time, providing spiritual care is one of the biggest joys of my work here at MPC.

What is spiritual care, anyway? It isn’t therapy (although we may feel some feelings). It isn’t social work (although we may solve a problem or two). It isn’t leadership training or crisis intervention or life coaching or church stewardship or Bible study. To me, spiritual care is the work of accompanying souls, bearing witness to that which lies under the surface, and holding it up to the light of God’s love. While we are bustling about busy with our lives, our souls may be secretly grieving… or struggling with conflict… or searching for meaning and direction… or even feeling lost. Or they may be bursting with joy, excitement, and love — and still not have the chance to express these. Take “soul” in the religious or psychological sense, but no matter how you take it, there is this deeper part of our selves that doesn’t get to come out and play very often because it’s too different from the rest of our lives. Maybe we don’t know what to do with it… maybe we’d rather not “go there.” If ever you find yourself feeling that deep inner disconnect, it’s time to look for some spiritual care. Come talk to me or Ben, or find another way through journaling or prayer. There are so many different ways of caring for our souls. My prayer for each of us today is that our souls may not feel alone.

Every Blessing,
Talitha